Learning to Shut up

Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut. -Proverbs 10:19 (NLT)

The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. -Proverbs 18:21 (NLT)

Oooooh the good ole' book of Proverbs, how I love thee...

Anyone who knows me pretty well knows that I have always loved to talk... talk, talk and talk and talk some more... I think I started taking advantage of my freedom of speach when i moved out I spoke even more than anyone thought possible. Growing up my dad burned the phrases "speak when spoken too" and "it's better to be seen and not heard" into my mind over and over. I was always in trouble for my mouth, so you think that in 27 years I may have learned many lessons on the consequences of 'overspeaking', and I have. But sometimes even when we know what the end result can be we do it anyways out of habit.

I asked God a few months ago to seriously change me. Work in me in a way that I never really allowed him to before... be raw, honest, brutal if he may... little did I know what I was getting myself into. The changes and growth have been so amazing to be a part of, but reaping what I have sown has been terrible.

Over and over I remind myself that I am made in his image not the world's image. At the same time Satan tries to remind me that I am still this drama seaking, overspeaking, too blunt, harsh woman. My stronghold is my mouth. Honestly, I think that most of the human race struggles with this same thing but makes excuses for it. I have been known to use some excuses more than once for my words that have spilled out. I have justified many of my words and tried to explain my reasons for them. The problem is this: our tongues are our biggest enemies... They hurt people even if our heart never meant to do so. Sometimes the best thing for us to do is drop the excuse of "I was just being open and honest" and instead just shut up. Stop laying everything out on the table because you think that is the right thing to do. Pray first and then wait... be still... don't say anything.... our lack of words may do more healing then any speaking could...

Have you ever been in a situation where there were so many words exchanged that you start looking for every way to prove that the other person is wrong and your words were right? Then when you respond it just keeps going and going and going? What would have happened if in the very very beginning you would have let God do ALL the talking and you would have just shut up? I think this all the time.

I am infamous for 'fixing' or thinking that I am doing the 'fixing' by talking things out. I am not saying that talking things out is the incorrect way of doing things, BUT sometimes God wants us to quit going to eachother and go to Him so he can do the 'fixing'. Another phrase comes to mind from childhood when I think of this thought "silence is golden".

Maybe all those times I got offended by my dad's comments I should have taken them into consideration... Maybe my big mouth at times needs a piece of tape over it. Are you overtalking? Are you being a peacemaker through all your explaining or questioning? Or is your talking making the conflict grow?

Before we speak we need to think to ourselves "If I tell this person this, is this going to cause conflict? Is this going to help them? Is this going to bring encouragement?"

Do your words speak life? Love? Encouragement?

I know many times my words don't... and trust me. You will reap what you sow... You will see what your words can really do to people... sometimes those outcomes are the most beautiful thing you have ever seen, and for that you should praise our Father... but there will be times when we speak before we really think, and those times can cause some of the biggest hurts you will ever see. Sometimes we speak later and it is still not the right time and that too will hurt someone and not help them...

Thank you Lord for showing me how to start shutting my big mouth... this is the hardest thing I am still learning but through You it can be done. Amen.

Don't use foul or abusive language. Let EVERYTHING you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. -Ephesians 4:29 (NLT)